celebratory gift programs! birthdays and safeversaries.

hello again changelings & strangelings!

i'm excited to announce that i am introducing two celebratory gift programs: birthdays and safeversaries.

i will be publishing a full official page on my website that details these free bottle programs and how to redeem them, but i wanted to get this blog post up because i was already announcing the changes to trinket packs - i figured i'd just take care of both announcements at once. (here's the reddit post i've just made with both announcements.)

the birthday program

every year during your birthday month, when you place an order, you're eligible for a free 5mL EdP or 10mL EdT.

for anyone with a june birthday who still has an order in queue, feel free to email me with your choice before the end of july!

otherwise, if you've already celebrated a birthday this year, please see the last section!

the safeversary program

this one is intended to celebrate recovery, so please note that i (non-graphically and briefly) mention topics related to addiction and mental illness below. i've tried to keep it very surface level for safety concerns though!

what does a "recovery" or "safeversary" include? what counts as one?

recovery includes but isn't limited to:

• soberversaries
• anniversaries of eating disorder recovery
• recovery / abstinence from self-injury.

those just happen to be all of mine, but you may have a different one, like leaving an abusive or dangerous situation or an anniversary related to a major health event.

(if you've been considering recovery of some kind and you feel like this is a nudge from the universe, that's great! but please take your time. recovery can be overwhelming. be sure, take precautions, get a good support system in place. your 6 month gift will be waiting for you when you're ready.)

here are some less trauma-recovery-focused examples:

• things like transition dates, coming out dates, surgery dates, HRT dates, even just self-acknowledgment dates of some kind. whatever it is, it's all valid, and if there's any kind of self-doubt about the validity of the progress you've made, like "nobody else knows," or "i haven't taken any steps yet" or even "i don't know what steps i want to take," i'll just say that dismantling oppressive structures of gender expression and sexual expression takes a lifetime of choosing self-love, so wherever you are on this journey, it's worth celebrating.
• anything where it's like, "i'm choosing myself and my own well-being today and i'm gonna have to choose it every day from now on to get through this," that counts.
• dates marking important annual events for you like personal losses, pet adoption days, etc. if there's anything that happens yearly and it's like "oof, the body remembers!"
• something as simple as "beginning today, i'm going to start celebrating myself and the importance of being here" is totally valid. fragrance rituals can be a really powerful form of somatic care, so if improving your self-care and mental wellness is a commitment you want to make, this might be a good way to celebrate.
• reasons of financial accessibility; perfume is a luxury, but again, somatic care is something everyone deserves, so maybe it's a type of thing where knowing you can get a free bottle of perfume once a year without any financial strain makes a meaningful difference to your well-being. totally valid.
• anything else, really - your safeversary only has to be meaningful for you, nobody else. if none of the above examples quite fits your situation, i trust you to find a reason for celebrating your safeversary that resonates with you.

what does the program include?

the program includes a $5 gift at the first 6 month mark and a free 5mL EdP or 10mL EdT of your choice at the annual mark.

all you have to do is email me during your redemption month, BUT i'll be posting an official page that you can refer back more easily than this gigantic novel of a blog post <3

important note - the Shop app eats comments, and i can't guarantee comments will always make it through either way, so it's better to email me after you place an order just to ensure i see the redemption request! i'll make a note of this in the official program page, but i wanted to stress it here too.

redemption eligibility

• there are no eligibility requirements. everyone gets to choose one month where they can redeem their safeversary gift, no questions asked.
• you do not need to prove eligibility to me for whatever type you've chosen. for example, if you choose your first day of sobriety, you don't need to prove to me that you're sober. this goes for any possible example. i can't stress "no questions asked" enough.
• there's no such thing as losing eligibility. if you've chosen a recovery-based safeversary and your recovery day resets for any reason, as far as my shop is concerned, you did not lose eligibility. keep going. please redeem your gift as normal and don't think twice about it.
• please note that only a single 6 month mark redemption will be honored. this goes hand-in-hand with the above bullet point. there are no resets in my world, just progress. this keeps things even & fair, resulting in a regular cadence of redemption for everyone.
• here's an example of a safeversary redemption cadence for clarity: let's say you have your first 6 month safeversary in december 2024. that's when you request your $5 off coupon, and your one year mark would be in june 2025, so that's when you request your first free bottle, and then you get another one annually, so you'd make the same request in june 2026.

privacy

your recovery is none of my business. like, i know that sounds rude, i get that this is a sensitive thing, so i mean this in the best way possible. whatever you choose for your safeversary? i'm not gonna ask about it or question it.

my program is intended to help you celebrate and to cheer you on. as such, there's no part of this where i'm, like, taking on any kind of accountability or vigilance role. i'm just hanging out in the sidelines, wielding perfume like a pompom!

as such:

• the type of safeversary does not need to be disclosed to me when you redeem. just let me know whether it's your 6mo mark or annual. (ofc, you're always welcome to share if you'd like to, i always have bandwidth for that kind of thing and it's not an overstep at all.)
• this program is based on good faith & trust - no skepticism, no judgments made, no questions asked. you don't need to prove eligibility to me in any way.
• i won't track your dates and monitor your progress. my brain is a sieve and i won't be memorizing anyone's dates even if you shop with me a lot! i'm not gonna overstep, this is your thing to manage and i'm just here for the celebratory good sniffs.
• your "safeversary" is private. i will never acknowledge to anyone besides yourself that you have requested a safeversary gift. or, for that matter, share anything personal about you or our conversations anywhere. (i can't believe i have to say that, but i know that people with platforms take liberties. shop owners have access to terrifying amounts of PII and that's already a lot to worry about without someone announcing your sobriety without your permission. your privacy, trust, and security is genuinely very important to me.)

what to do if you've already celebrated yours this year

for any of the celebratory gifts that fell in june, please reach out before the end of july!

for dates prior to june, just reach out to me and let me know. same deal - by the end of july please. :)

if you don't mind waiting until your date rolls around next year, that's awesome too because it means i'll have more resources for people who need a bit more support right now. but, again, i'll leave that up to you - this is one of those situations where some people won't care at all and some people will have stronger feelings, and there's no right or wrong reaction.

if you find yourself more in the latter category and you're feeling like "okay, yeah, that would make a big difference for me," i totally understand, don't hesitate to reach out! and if you don't mind waiting until next year, that's awesome too.

if you redeem this year for a date that occurred prior to june, i'll make a note on your order so that you can resume redemption in your "normal" month the next year. (for example, if your safeversary date was in february 2024 but you want to redeem this month, that's fine, we'd just pick it back up in february 2025 so you can redeem in the month that's important to you going forward)

other considerations / limitations / exceptions

• bottles are limited to what i have in stock - if an item is listed as out of stock, i can't offer rain checks. feel free to reach out and check on a restock date. if something will be out for a while, we can find a work-around!
• free bottles are limited to one per order, so if your safeversary happens to fall in the same month as your birthday, you would need to place two orders that month to redeem. everyone whose dates occur in two different months will have to make two orders as well, so this rule helps keeps things fair. <3
• if there's a personal extenuating circumstance that prevents redemption during your normal month, like a hospitalization or family emergency or trip, please feel free to reach out to me within two weeks of your redemption period so we can discuss an exception for you. i feel like that's a reasonable period of time but, you know, shit happens and you might need more time, just let me know.

fin

i'm a little embarrassed to admit that i've been sober since april 1, 2019 and have never once celebrated. honestly, i don't even really acknowledge my own birthday, which is in july. and i don't even really know my recovery dates for my ED or self-injury. BUT, i'd love to get better about tracking these things, and... idk how else to do it, and this feels like a good start. if you're like me at all, celebrating might be hard for you too, and i thought this might help all of us learn to be a little more self-accommodating. fighting to stay here is a major accomplishment; we all deserve to feel proud of that work. this is my way of cheering all of us on, and i hope it helps a little bit.

thank you for reading! again, i'll make an official page on the site about the program by Friday evening! please feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions!